Snow & Sun

They left the hotel one by one. Finally, she was the only one left from the cycling group. And it became Christmas eve before she took her bags and caught a flight to go south by the coast. Her hands were aching and she felt exhausted just by getting up from the bed and into the shower before breakfast. Onboard the plane she almost regrets her choice to stay in this busy country. It seemed like everyone was going for the same flight, for the same direction and she was the only one European style. Normally she felt happy by talking to people bur right here and now she just tried to hide through the check-in lines and security queues.

When she reached the exotic destination they were met by an enormous heat and humidity and a lot of fully dressed Santa Clauses who sang Christmas song with a never-ending energy. She almost admired them. She could feel everything but Christmas vibes in the sticky heat. When she finally had her luggage from the belt she went out to the driver a good friend had supported her with. The air condition in the car felt so revealing that she forgave the driver who probably had got his license only through bribes. She was surprised to find herself so badly negative, maybe it was the usual post cycling race stress that had sat in. She had felt it every time she had finished a race together with other riders. The loneliness which ate itself into every fibre of your body and mostly the soul. Maybe it would feel better tomorrow.

The little hut by the ocean was nothing special but clean with a shower and a small veranda facing the garden. Here she would sit and do nothing for at least a week. After that, she had no plans. The situation felt even more awkward than before. What's wrong with me, she asked herself while thinking of everything she had back home. She finally had to decide to just relax and enjoy the water, some great food, enormous amounts of time for all the books that had been kept in her bag since she left home. She decided to feel blessed and told herself she was worth this paradise after doing that crazy ride a few days earlier. Her eyelids felt heavy and one day after another she allowed herself to fall asleep wherever and whenever her body told her so.

New years eve came closer. She didn't talk to hardly anyone but the guy serving her breakfast, lunch and dinner. One of these days she had a message from him. It was some pictures he had taken during one of the days they had ridden together. Well, honestly it was more than just some pictures, it was some pictures that told everything about them. They looked cool, strong and sexy and she thought to herself why she hadn't kissed him there and then in the beautiful evening light. Of course, she couldn't do it just like that but now looking at the two of them, smiling towards the camera she realized it must have been obvious to anyone that there was a connection between them. A stream that closed everyone else out. Or was this only in her head? She couldn't tell but felt happy when looked at the pictures. She smiled for herself and decided to keep him as a beautiful memory, that was all he could be.

She wrote back to him, just to say a short thank you. She knew pretty well that he had his family life back in that little town far from here. He answered at once and even if she thought she shouldn't she couldn't stop herself from continuing the conversation. He asked her when she was planning to leave his country. He asked her what she was planning for all alone. And he asked her if he could come. She couldn't say no, she didn't want to say no and he bought a ticket, half the price of his monthly income. She felt a bit ashamed when she asked at the reception for an extra bed for a friend because she knew that they knew it was just an excuse to make it look proper. What a way to start a new year. So totally wrong and nothing but absolutely right. She felt both happy and tensed when she counted the hours for the evening flight. She realized she didn't know him at all and she knew he had already touched her soul.

The driver came by sunset and they started to go this bent roads the opposite direction this time. She was glad he didn't speak hardly any English so that she could stay alone with her thoughts while they were reaching the airport minute by minute. She had sent him a picture because she realized he had only seen her with cycling clothes on and that colourful helmet on the top. The few times she had taken it off, her hair had been dirty and hidden under a bandana. Maybe he wouldn't recognize her at all? Her legs were shaking when she walked towards the doors this lukewarm evening the first day of a new year. The first day of a new life.